Our latest Baker's Dozen is with comedian/writer Ron Zimmerman! This interview was a bit different as Ron decided he didn’t like some of our questions. Which is cool, because, let’s be honest – sometimes our questions suck. So he decided to answer the ones he wanted to and pass over the ones he thought were shit. Fair enough. But it’s all good, because he added some bonus questions of his own. So, without further adieu, please enjoy our Half Baker’s Dozen with Ron Zimmerman!
Ron Prepares for our Baker's Dozen.
1) You started out doing stand up comedy, what made you decide to go into writing sitcoms?
My girlfriend at the time, Kallie Khouri, told me if I was gonna lay around drunk all day watching TV I should try writing it as well. She was my greatest inspiration.
2) One of your early writing gigs was on the short-lived Ryan O’Neil/Farrah Fawcet comedy “Good Sports.” Was Farrah as batshit insane back in 1991 as she is today?
No. She was fuckin great. I felt bad for her because the show was such a mess. she treated me wonderfully and I’d have sex with her today if I could.
3) You had the distinct privilege of working on “The Michael Richards Show,” which was regarded as the first of the many “Seinfeld Curse” shows. At what point did you realize you were working on a sinking ship, and how much of that show’s failure was really NBC tinkering too much?
The show was a dizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzaster from day one. I never brought one single personal item to that office. good money though. NBC did NOT ruin that show. That is an example of a network having the right way to go and the creative side going totally wrong. That show was trying to reinvent the wheel instead of be a sit com. Michael is monstrously gifted and it would have worked if everyone had just decided it wasn't slumming to do a funny, traditional, network television show.
4) You worked for a bit on Howard Stern’s radio show after Jackie “The Joke Man” left. Did you ever want that as a full time gig? And who would win in a drinking contest, you or Artie Lange?
I could not live in New York because I have a pack of dogs and also was totally wrong for the gig because Howard and I agree on everything and are too much alike. Oh, and I hate New York. as to the Artie thing ....well, considering I got busted on day 2 for bringing vodka into the studio and drinking on air at 7:00 a.m., I’d bet on me to win that contest.
5) One of your many credits is writing for “My Wife & Kids.” What was it like being one of the only writers on staff whose last name wasn’t “Wayans?”
It was like being the only black man in a southern town 2 weeks after the civil war ended. You know you're free but you feel like a slave anyway. I FUCKING LOVE that the Wayans have gotten powerful enough to make white people THEIR niggers. I swear to god, I celebrate them for it.
Ron in his "Where's Waldo" hat.
6) I'm going to list some names, you jot down some thoughts about them.
(Example: Farrah Fawcet = Nice woman, liked the nose candy)
• Howard Stern = My first friend in show business. My first fan. My dear friend. One of the most honest, nicest, humans I have ever met. and a comic and broadcasting genius. The duke Ellington of comedy. Howard’s makes Lenny fuckin Bruce look like Gabe Kaplan. He is in the pantheon of comedy with Pryor, Newhart, Carson, Cosby, Seinfeld, Maher, Rock, Rickles, J. Lewis, Gottfried, Kaufman .... A few others ... The legends, man.
• Don Reo = The "Don" in Don Reo should be his title, not his name. He is "the Don" of sit coms.
• Jay Mohr = Fuckin hilarious. I think we scare the shit outta each other and I don't know why.
• Marjorie Gross = Along with Larry David, the greatest 1st draft comedy teleplay writer in the past 20 years.
• Ron Leavitt = Hilarious guy! Fun guy! Never takes it seriously. Real talented.
• Jim Vallely = THE comic genius who's ONLY equal in the past 20 yrs is Larry David. this guy can do EVERYTHING and like Larry, do it all better than anyone else. He has made more people rich than I. T.& T.
• Pamela Anderson = Don't tell anyone but she's an awful lot smarter and more shrewd than she likes you to think. There may be two giant brains in those boobs.
• Larry Charles = Truly, one of my artistic & comedy heroes AND life heroes. This is a man of great talent, a man of kindness in the most unkind business on earth and a man of deep honor and integrity. People think Larry stands out because of the way he looks. That isn't true. L.C. stands taller than us because of the person he is so it seems like he's standing out. He is the man and artist we should all aspire to be.
This is about when Ron had decided he'd had enough of our sophomoric questions and chose to take matters into his own hands by submitting his own list of names & thoughts. Works for us!
• Farrah Fawcett = I'd still have sex with her.
• Jodie Foster = As far as my personal experiance, so NOT gay. And hilarious, great company and a truly decent human being.
• Ryan O'Neal = If he wasn't rich and in show biz, he'd be in jail where he belongs.
• Robert Blake = Gentle soul. Did not kill that whore.
• Jessie Biel = The fuckin real deal, man. In person makes Jessica Alba look like a bowl of dogfood.
• Bruce Willis = Nicest fuckin movie star ya ever wanna meet and one funny motherfucker.
• Al Pacino = Only movie star funnier than Bruce I ever met. Best guy to sit and bullshit with ever put on the planet.
• Beverly Deangelo = THE most talented person I have ever met and one of the 5 funniest.
• Bill Maher = The last real man in america. The John Wayne of intellectuals. A real live hero. Most couragous and brilliant man I have ever known. Walks what he talks.
• Joey Lauren Adams = The sexiest broad alive that didn't become a big star.
• Amhet, Moon, and Dweezil Zappa = Too cool to discuss. And nice.
• Drew Barrymore = Is really that nice. I would marry her on the phone.
• Scott Baio = The person that writes the right role for him and gives him another series that reinvents him is gonna make a shitload of money.
• Ron Zimmerman = Overrated, underrated, boorish, drunken, miserable, depressing, skirt chasing, pugnacious, asshole, lout, that should have been dead ten years ago. Has made bundles of money for everyone but himself. An idiot that cannot think two days in advance.
So there you have TVadviceguy's first Half Dozen! Thanks to Mr. Zimmerman for bothering with our inane questions. Or at least half of them anayway. You gotta give him credit for being brutally honest. We like that here at TVadviceguy.com. I'd say keep an eye out for his upcoming projects, but I don't know what they are. Hope you enjoyed this very entertaining interview!
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